081508

So, I sit here at the computer, looking at the keyboard, not having a clue how to write what I want to say. But, I'll try.

I feel as if ever since I ran against Christian in the elections... I want to be better than him. Losing against him took a humongous blow to my ego so that made me feel down in the dumps. Then he starts getting close to Ninah... one on my old bestfriends. Then i thin kto myself "Everyone likes him more than me" and now he'll probably get close to all my favorite people that are jrs. It drives me kind of insane. I know its jealousy talking, but its that feeling of "not being good enough as him" and it sucks. He just kinda took what I was determined to get throughout all of freshman year, and I guess I resent him for that fact. I don't want to, because inside I know hes a nice guy. When I lost, I tried to be cool about it, but I wasn't. I told myself I was ok with it because "he was a good guy" when really inside I was pissed because I wanted to be president.